Self-Care for Support Professionals
You have been called a Problem-solver, Fixer, Anchor, or Pillar. People depend on, come to, and rely on you to take care of their needs. Others have learned that you are ready at a moment’s notice to handle the most complex, convoluted, or contentious situation. You are indispensable to your clients, colleagues and employers. You are the well from which others draw when they need ideas, actions or help to get to their next level. Unfortunately, when the well runs dry it becomes useless.
Professional burnout is the personification of a well that has run dry.
We are taught to be self-less early in life. We are told to share our toys, candy and space with others. If we hesitate or we refuse, we are told that we are selfish. We are told that sharing and being self-less is the key to gaining friends and popularity. It will get you ahead in life because “no one will like you if you are selfish.” We are expected to put other’s needs before our own in our personal and professional lives.
We also have an inherent desire to treat others well. Altruism, demonstrating unselfish concern for others, has its rewards and makes us feel good. The brain releases the hormone dopamine when we benefit others and they show appreciation for our actions. Being kind, sharing, or providing opportunity causes feelings of joy unlike any other. The more we help, the more appreciation we receive and this causes us to feel better, up to a point. We get to a point when we realize that we are giving of ourselves and not replenishing our own stock.
The water in wells are replenished by underground aquifers.
An inner conflict develops as we age because we realize that constantly giving of oneself can be tiring. When our actions go unappreciated, we begin to feel overwhelmed and stressed out. The well of good feelings dries as we realize that selflessness is not the panacea that we were lead to believe. Constant distress and overwhelming demands lead to burnout. A “burned out” professional is physically and emotionally exhausted. This person is unable and lacks the desire to perform required work related tasks. Signs of burnout are below.
Fatigue – early on you may feel as if you have very little energy or feel tired throughout the day. You may begin feeling physically and emotionally drained. You may lack motivation or initiative.
Insomnia – initially you may have difficulty falling asleep and sleeping through the night. You may awaken repeatedly or feel as if you have not rested upon waking in the morning. As this condition progresses, you may find that you cannot fall asleep no matter how tired you are.
Forgetfulness, poor concentration – you have trouble remembering simple information. You also find that you have difficulty concentrating or focusing. This has a negative effect at home and work.
Physical – chronic headaches, chest pains, heart palpitations, shortness of breath, elevated blood pressure, elevated blood sugar, muscle soreness and joint achiness, colds/flu, bacterial infections, cold sores, etc.
Change in Appetite – increase or decrease in appetite, binging on certain foods or junk food.
Change in Mood – irritability, concern, or occasional sadness may progress to feelings of anger, guilt, hopelessness, or worthlessness. Anger outbursts may become prevalent.
Deep wells feed themselves and rarely go dry.
Self-care is embodied by the actions, thoughts, and behaviors that strengthen your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual being. Some say that you cannot take care of others if you do not take care of yourself. I say that taking care of self acknowledges the value that our Creator has placed upon each of us. Self-care goes beyond hair, nails, clothing, or cars. It encompasses the actions that feed and nourish who we are at all times.
Take care of your body by drinking plenty of water, eating whole foods and exercising. Stretch before getting out of bed to warm up your joints, muscles, and tendons. Challenge your mind by reading, learning a new language, or using your non-dominant had. Strengthen your spirit by regularly meditating or praying according to your particular faith. Here are a few foundational self-care actions.
Begin with a healthy self-esteem. My definition of self-esteem is “Treating yourself with the same respect, positive regard and compassion that you have been taught to show others.”
Write your professional vision – align your thoughts, actions and behaviors with that vision.
Become outcome oriented – take at least one action toward your stated vision every day.
Get rid of clutter – Throw out or give away all of the stuff you keep saving that you never look at or use.
Build a surplus – of nurturing, encouraging, supportive friends. Also build genuine professional relationships.
Ditch the parasites – people who drain you of your energy, resources, and peace of mind.
Be honest – with yourself regarding your strengths and limitations.
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Marcyline Bailey
workers to relax, empower, advocate and learn.” She also founded HappyHalfHour.Club for “hardworking professionals who want to be happy.
Latest posts by Marcyline Bailey (see all)
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